I Have What

On my Anniversary.. May 5.. Cinco de Mayo.... I was sitting at my computer planning another week of blogging... when it hit me...

The pain.

I was dying, or at least that is the way I felt.

I am a mom though. I tried to suck it up. I mean come on... I labored for 12 hours with only half of my body numb from the epidural. I felt the doctor cut open the left side of the body as they hurried to pull my son out. I took that pain.. and I lived.

This pain though, it got worse and worse almost immediately.

John wasn't home, he was sitting the Gulf of Mexico somewhere.. and it was Saturday, so little man was home with me.

No bueno.

Two hours later I was doubled over in pain, crying and screaming on the phone for my mother to get over here. She lives about 40 minutes away, so she came as fast as she could. The pain was terrible though.

When she finally got here, I had about another hour of pain and then it mysteriously disappeared. (See, moms do make everything better.)

Ugh. I thought to myself, "Please Jesus, don't be playing tricks with me." and then I said a prayer to beg for forgiveness for missing church last week and promised I would be in church tomorrow.

I thought it was a ovarian cyst. It's been years since I had one, but the pain seemed comparable.


Until it showed up again Sunday afternoon.

"Brother Pucker!" I cursed under my breath and called my mom again. She was on her way to a wedding, but would have her car pool drop her off.

Two hours later and sitting in the parking lot of the ER trying to decide if I wanted to expose my son to ER germs... the pain vanished just as my mom showed up. (Another sign that moms make everything better.)

I just decided that for the night I should go home with my mother. Maybe her presence would keep the pain away.

It didn't.

I went to the ER. They ran all kinds of tests on me and sent me home telling me it was a ovarian cyst. I told them it wasn't. They wouldn't take my word or the credentials from my online Dr. Degree called Google. So I went home.. disappointed... and loaded with prescriptions for pain killers.

I went to the OBGYN two days later. I had a cyst, but this was not what was causing the pain. He sent me home.

I ended up in another ER and after drinking some nasty chalk stuff and shooting some dye through my body after poking me 52 times to get a IV in.....  they did a CT scan.

Verdict?


I have 2 kidney stones.

AND

The mother load of gallstones.

"Wonderful!" I told the PA. "You are just bouncing with good news today." She laughed and sent me a Urologist.

I had to pee in a strainer for two weeks... yes.. gross.. and for two weeks.. double gross. I can't even use the restroom in peace much less try to balance a strainer while yelling at my three year old to get out of the bathroom while mommy looks for rocks.

He wanted to look for rocks too... 'sigh'.


I don't know where the kidney stone went, I never saw it.

and as for the gallstones... I will eventually need to have my gallbladder removed, but I am feeling much better for now and I really don't want to have surgery. 


But if I go MIA for a month again... you might should call my momma...


(PS. I do have some posts in May, so stay tuned..although everything will be backdated)